Klingons on the Starboard Bow

Kaplagh!

or

Kerplunk!

or something....

And Your Little Dog Too

Lions or Tigers or Bears?

Transform and Roll Out!

Dont I look butch?

No?

Well, straightish?

Captain Jack Sparrow

On My Knees Again...

In front of men in uniform too.

I Lost My Heart to a Starship Trooper

Captain Jack Harkness

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Of course I am now fully stuffed up with a shitter of a cold.
It began with me being very grouchy and headachey on Friday. I still did the mad round trip to MK in a day to do Collectormania though. Then ended up very rough Sunday, spewing the night away and being a sick boy on Monday.
Back in work today, just snotty of nose and getting through a box of balmed tissues like they are going out of style.

Incurable Romantic

There are a few colds going around. I guess its that time of year really. Dan has been slowly going down with something for a week or so, and determined to not let it get bad for him, and spread to me, I have been taking extra special care of him this week.
Tuesday night, I sent him home to bed, while I went for my back treatment, then bought some extra power super duper kicks total fucking arse Lemsip on the way home.
Last night, I got home about 45 mins before him, had a quick bath, topped it up and bubbled it up for him, ready for when he got in. I then surrounded it with strawberry scented candles, and got him a lemsip ready, so he could get in, and relax. Then , he had a chicken soup while we sat in bed and watched Heroes (series 2, eps 3 & 4), before I read him a chapter of his book and settled him down for the night.
Yes, I can be sweet and lovely. Its just not an everyday thing.

And, can I ask anyone who is reading to just bung a comment on? I really have no idea how many people drop by here. Be anonymous if you wish ... just a kind 'Hi, I'm reading' will be grand! Be nice to know numbers

Gym'll Fix It

So, the last four weeks have been a bit busy, with one thing and another, and my gym time has been the first thing to suffer.
You see, where I have had a lot on, its meant that I have been knackered and wont go when I am tired as I don't seem to benefit from it. Then there have been a few occasions when I have gone, and found it so busy, there are no machines available. So I have skipped about a bit, looking ..well .. like a poof frankly ... and given up, had a steam and a shower and come home. It is with this in mind that I am thinking of changing gyms. Largely as the other gym I am looking at is on the same roundabout as my current one, is another hotel - but just happens to be where the BBC put guest actors for any of the Who shows. But also I am forced to consider if being a member of any gym is worth my while.
I keep an eye on my actual weight and have spotted a pattern. When i am good and gym every other day, my weight is either 12 stone 10 or 11. When I am crap and don't get there (and this includes a full three week break, the first week of which was Disneyland Paris - ergo eating shite) I maintain 12 stone 12 or 13. So three lots of 70 mins per week, and 52 quid for the month, is making a maximum of 3lbs difference.
Do you ever ask yourself why?

Not just for Gays!

And certainly not a video for kids ... you have been warned

Cherish

Its taken me over 24 hours to tell you about this, because I was too excited.
Possibly the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, happened yesterday.
I got an e-mail from Madonna.
Seriously, actually from my Queen herself. The woman who has styled who I am, the man I have come to be, since I was 13. The Icon I have stood by all my adult life, regardless of press backing or slacking.... good times and bad.
No, I am not telling you what it said or pasting it here. Its my precious!

On a related note, that i am sure Madonna would be proud of ... poop. (honestly .. check the link to her blog .. it gets mentioned a lot!)
On Sunday, Smeagol was sick on the window ledge. I cleaned it up, bleached and such ... and as i always have done, flushed it away. But its only gone just round the U bend and stuck there. So now, water does trickle away.. but very slowly. So lets say its fine to number 1, but we cant do much else in there.
We have donned rubber gloves and had coat hangers, wires and metal things down there trying to clear it. Nada. Largely as we have a vertical 180 degree U bend ... so we can't get anything round the bastard thing
I have scoured three large supermarkets looking for a cleaning product to shift it. There is a huge range of sink and drain unblockers, for a variety of situations including, hair, grease, pasta and vegetables. Even options for slow trickling and standing water. All state not for use in toilets. How the fuck is anyone supposed to unblock a toilet?
So we tried one anyway .. and it did nothing, so now we need to get an expert in.
At least the new boiler finally gets fitted tomorrow.

Lazy Days and Sundays

Its been a quiet but somehow eventful weekend.
Friday I was feeling v v v tired. So Dan was out at a team night out and I had friends over whom I have been chatting with online for a while and thought that I should meet. Especially as they only live about three miles away. So Ade & Matt came over and all went swimmingly. I tried out my new coloured flame candles, Shelley bought. The green one was great, the orange kind of went between orange and blue. Then they both became little glass trays of fire when the crystals burnt down a bit. Scary.
Ade & Matt are an adorable couple. Ade has a long leather coat that Id steal but given it would trail about two feet behind me on the floor, id look silly. Then Ade dropped the biggest hint that he and I are going to get along just fine ... he recognised Kim Possible on my watch. Oh yeah! That makes him a special friend! V few people know who KP is.
The rest of the weekend was a combo of reading Seeing Redd, housework, cleaning up cat sick, Ugly Betty series 1 DVDs .. oh and we had a policeman over who let me do naughty things to him while he was in uniform, so that's another fantasy ticked off the list.
You get up to much?
And now, I am sat in work, drinking coke that is good for you.
Really.
Its Diet coke, sugar free and its antioxidant .. so its says. It has no taste either though, to be fair.

Just Say No

This is genuinely what me and my school mates looked like at the time ... I would have been Roland, the fat one ....

Shhh sweetie

So I had one of my treatments that are supposed to be curing my migraines on weds night. But this was from Dan's masseur not my own and was about 20 times rougher than I am used to. And it brought on the mother of all migraines.
Now, I know that an odd side effect of trying to clear the muscular tension that causes them, is that it can bring one on as it moves a lot of the tension and fluids in my shoulders, upper back and sinuses. But I do think Nerys works with that in mind, so uses a softer approach, with more frequent sessions, so as to cause me the least distress possible. I mean, she wont take any money for it, bless her (I have tried), so its not like she is just stretching it out to milk the cash from me.
I woke up in the wee hours of Thursday in agony. My shoulders and head felt like I had been beaten to a pulp. Then getting up for work, the headache and bad guts kicked in. I brought my breakfast straight back, but since then although feeling bilious, have kept food down. Today my head still feels muggy, my sinuses are killing me, and I have an ache that starts at the base of my skull and goes down to just above the knee.
Its not Russ' fault .... he did the job that needed doing, but I think I will only let him get his hands on me on Fridays from now on (ooer, that sounds wrong!), so the effects don't impact my job!
I did catch the new Ugly Betty on E4. So back in the routine of seeing the weds preview ... not sure if its just because I am feeling Pooky, but it felt very much like a set up ep for story lines to unfold for the season.
And Sarah Jane this week was awesome. I got to see the scene I saw them filming! Hurrah!
And finally .. somebody understands what I go through at work:

Box of Delights

Firstly, check this out .. Grrrrrrroooowl!

Secondly, I am writing this during a game of tube tag with Tree.
She hit me with this old chestnut.
I hit back with this. Dolly & Disney at Christmas? Surely cant be beat?
You'd think.
She curve balled this corker at me. Damn you Cher!
I am now searching for something Barbra Streisand festive ... if there's none out there, i am screwed.

Some Serious Shit...

Robbed I Tell You!

That was my initial reaction to Ugly Betty season 2 opener.
Its three weeks later, everyone seems to be ok, we have no explanation as to how Christina & Amanda got out of the cupboard, we dot really see the aftermath of Daniel & Alexis' accident, Santos is alive, well and wandering around with his (clearly shaved) chest out? I vaguely had the scent of a rodent at the conversation between Justin & Betty about Hilda never leaving her room, but it passed swiftly with the scene of Amanda & Marc (he looks like the kind of queer that would spell it with a C just to be a bit gayer, even though he was given the name with a K) and Amanda's swinging adopted parents. Its that or the cat did a shit and it came through the wall to greet us... I cant recall. Either way, by the time we ht the reveal, I had been hoodwinked and Dan was a flood of tears.
Of course, the scheduling of this season intrigues me. Usually, the UK channels hold back on the new season stuff until January so that we can have the full 20 odd ep run in one hit. Given Channel 4 are only about 10 days behind the USA on new UB eps, we are going to have to break with them for Christmas, November and February sweeps etc .... unless production is so far ahead that we can run right through as the season is mostly in the can already, which I don't think is the case. We shall see soon enough.
Welcome back Betty. I miss you when you aren't around.
Not much to say about the weekend. Saturday and Sunday were pretty much chill out days. Michelle has come to stay for a few days. And that really is about it.

Til Death Do Us Part

I just cant stop watching this. Its an old Madonna album track from Like A Prayer. Allegedly written about her marriage to Sean Penn. I cant put my finger on what the addiction with this video is.. its either the hot husband, the oh so American soap acting (just watch him shake her by the shoulders .. that'll bruise.... not) or the cute little bobbing along to the music 'she' does in the close ups. See what you think.

Then of course, there is the small matter of my own engagement. Its been 18 months since Dan asked me to officially become his civil partner. Fuck I still hate that. Sounds so cold. I am sticking with marry and bollocks to it. So anyhoo, we had a date to work towards of June 28 2008. This was before flues collapsed necessitating new boilers, clutches fell apart and washing machine pumps gave out on us. And of course, we are in the Christmas leg now too. That said, I am a big believer in Christmas gifts meaning something, rather than just being a flick through the Argos catalogue thinking 'ooh, that will do for Rolf' .... I mean, the solution is in the problem there. If you are only thinking 'that will do' then you aren't really putting your heart and soul into it, so what are you saying to that friend or relative? I think the people I choose to give to are worth more than 'that will do'. Take Rach's birthday present this year - she vaguely mentioned how she loved the tv show Miss Match but it seemed to have vanished without trace. Dan & I looked up the episodes, sourced them online and made her a complete dvd set. It didn't cost us a great deal of money, but we put thought time and effort in. I know for a fact that Rach was blown away by it - and its something that cant be bought anywhere else, so will always be personal from us. But back to weddings......
We could do this next year still, if we sort it out with the incredibly unhelpful fuckwits at Cardiff registry office. I get the distinct impression that the woman there is against same sex marriages .. at least I hope that's it. I'd hate to think she was as short and impersonal with every couple she deals with. We could then do a short ceremony, in an office somewhere with a handful of chums. I'd like to do something a bit bigger than that but really don't care for putting lots of money into a big show. That money could be sending me to Florida, California or New York after all.
I do find that people don't seem to understand that I don't want and cant afford a big wedding. People react from crestfallen to downright indignant when I say there is going to be no big ceremony, no big reception, if you want to come to the meal you have to pay for your own and any party we do throw will just be in a scout hut probably. Well they can all suck my dick. Its OUR wedding and we shall do it our way. My actual friends seem to get that, a lot of the casual hangers on (casual mates, work colleagues and such) don't.
So, next year, 2009, 2010 ... who knows at the moment. But it wont be a big affair, will probably have some kind of sci fi theme attached, a meal at somewhere reasonably priced and a disco at night with a finger buffet that I will probably cater for myself. Your invite will be in the post.

Pooky

Yes, that's how I am feeling today. Sympathy neither required or desired though.
Its a busy week at work, which is a good thing, but being a 'creative' it can leave me more than a little drained. I am sure a lot of writers feel the same. Especially if its a job you are doing as necessity rather than 'fuck me what a cracking idea for a script I've just had' which tends to be exhilarating. Writing for car sales, car boot sales, LPG car conversions, bike shops and carpets sales events just isn't exciting. Even if you do then hear your work being blasted out to 400,000 listeners across Wales as an outcome.
Vibes to young Pete and his family too please. Not my story to tell, but Mrs Pete could do with the love. Thankee sai.
So here is a scruples style question for you. You are spending a week staying at the house of a very close friend. You also happen to have a casual shag in their area. They are cool with you having people over to get your end away. You have said person over while your mates are out at work. Person then asks about popping over one evening, your mate says its fine. You then spend the entire evening in the bedroom with your fuck buddy (say about 4 hours worth) so don't really see your mate that night, but they are in. Are you being rude?
My answer is not at all, if that mate has told you already that they are ok with this. This was what happened last night at mine you see. Richie is here this week (goes home tomorrow, came back with us last Friday) and he chats to a young chap up the valleys (who is hot as hell) and he popped over last night. I thought very little of it, but Rich has sent me a text just now saying he feels it was rude of him to vanish for the whole evening .. they surfaced eventually after Dan & I went to bed. I don't think it was rude at all. If anything I was happy for him. Maybe if he hadn't been down for a whole week but just a day or two, that would be different. But we spent all weekend hanging out, and Monday a& Tuesday evening too - then will have tonight before he heads off as I leave for work tomorrow. So its not like I haven't spent quality time with him. No, not that kind of quality time. It would be like copping off with a brother. Just wondered what other people thought.
Of course, the bigger question is, should the sitch arise, is it now wrong for me to cop off with Adam? Would it be like sleeping with your brother/sister in law? Rich & Adam aren't dating, just mates. But they probably would date if they didn't live in London & Wales respectively. There are few places I wont go .. but pissing on a close friends playground is one of them. Not that i am into pissing on people. Well, there was one time .... but then he asked me if next time he could wear a nappy and call me daddy while I fucked him .... so we didn't meet again.
Then of course there is the man in Swansea who messaged me out of the blue with a very very dirty message about what he would like to do to me. The phrase fuck pig came into it. As did squeal piggy squeal weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Not decided on whether I will pursue that as yet, but have sent equally filthy responses. Until he said he wanted to Bert me. This involves him fucking me, the wiping his dick on my forehead giving me a shit mono brow ala Bert from Sesame Street. He is, of course, assuming I don't prepare for such action and make sure I am clean down there first. Vile.

Prince & Princesses

And suddenly its 14 days later and its all been a bit insane. As a wise ex nun turned nanny for a Captain once sang, lets start at the very beginning, a very good place to start...
The Big Prince Night Out. My God it was tense. I could make a screenplay out of the drama that was me getting to the gig in time. It would be a bit shit though as it would consist of a good 40 mins of me standing in front of Cardiff Castle, huffing and puffing waiting for the megabus to show up and then the majority of the film would be me sat on a bus reading the Doctor Who novel Wetworld, occasionally glancing out of the window to scowl at the traffic on the M4 or in London. The next bit would be vaguely exciting as I dash across London to get from Victoria to the O2 Arena in 35 mins to try and get to the start of the gig at 8.30 - which will go up on time as it live on sky news .... especially the bits where I get stuck at the ticket machine behind a drunk guy who's card gets refused 5 times but he just keeps trying to buy a tube ticket. I would possibly insert me doing some killer karate chop at this point, rather than me just switching queues. Then instead of me standing on an almost empty tube on the Jubilee Line, I could insert a train full of rampaging Zombies. I might see if James Moran (writer of Severance who keeps a damn fine blog himself) wants to help .. if Pete is too busy that is.
So as it happened, Rach and I were still hacking along the corridor trying to work out how to operate glo-sticks as we heard the band strike up Controversy. By mid second song, we were in our seats,m which were frankly, the BEST SEATS EVER for a gig. Smack in front of the stage, but raised enough to give a view, on an aisle. Loving the work. I could wax lyrical about the ins and outs of the gig, our outstanding synchronised dancing, the electric atmosphere that comes from a sold out house made of real fans ... but unless you were there, you wont really get it.
Post concert, we had about a 2 hour wait before we could hit the Indigo2 for the After Show gig. This involved the worlds longest toilet queue ever and some mad man climbing lamp posts to try and steal a Prince banner by setting fire to the corners to detach it. No, really! Then the queue for the after show seemed to stretch back into Kent .... but we got in in quite good time and bagged decent seats upstairs.
Around 1.30, the band kicked in and the curtain opened to reveal the New Power Generation (excpeted), Prince on lead guitar (hoped for but wasn't guaranteed) and Amy Winehouse on vocals (total surprise!). This then lead to a very funky three hour jam, featuring a range of Prince hits and album tracks. I have never been to anything quite like it and have to say being in such an intimate venue packed out with real fans and real music lovers ... it was truly amazing.
But at 4.30, we wandered out, tired but elated to try and catch one of the three cabs that were operating. Along with about 2500 of the other 3000 people there. It was going to take some time ... or would have had some enterprising chap not been there with his car, offering slightly under taxi rates to drive people home. Rach thought we were possibly going to be murdered, but I had already fought off that trainload of zombies, so was confident I could handle some small Ukrainian looking bloke in a rather roomy Ford.
Now you'd think that given the hellish journey up, 5 hours worth of gig n shit would mean the end of this tale. But no ....
Being the canny lass she is, Rach had espied a Magnum vending machine in the hotel foyer. As we pooled cash to pay the £18 for the 20second cab ride to the hotel (it would have been over £20 in a black cab and wasn't doable on foot unless we fancied either walking through the Blackwall Tunnel or swimming the Thames) and was now worrying that we couldn't afford said ice cream treats when we got back. I assured her I had further change in my pocket to cover an ice cream. So we arrive, we head for machine, I insert the ludicrous price required for said sweet on a stick, Rach chooses with Almond variety.
Computer says no
Or rather make another selection. Given Rach has now been up just over 24 hours, she has a little trouble with the idea of that one being sold out, starting us both giggling as I try and advise on other selections. She goes for a classic and I settle for diet coke and a bag of crisps.
We retire to our room and start to finally unwind. After conversation of how it has actually been the best night out in the history of everness, I go to brush my teeth. The hot tap is on slightly... and being the freak I am, cant actually let this go and need it to stop. It wont budge left to turn off, so I figure that a turn right may loosen it up a tad so I can turn it off completely. Wrong. Its now running a bit more and still wont shift left. I venture out to Rach to advise her what I am doing (I was tired) and go back in to try the same method again. Resulting in a steady stream of scolding hot water and hysterical giggles from the pair of us. I eventually got the tap off, soaking my night shirt in the process and we got some sleep.
Saturday was coffee with Richie before getting the bus home. Even this simple task went wrong as I failed to notice that the DLR train I was on didn't go to Canary Wharf where I was meeting him, so I had to hop off at Poplars and walk back..... which you'd think would be easy ... finding a bloody great sky scraper in London that was built to access a hole in the space time continuum .. but no .. could constantly see it, just couldn't get to the fucking thing.
Then of course, Sunday was a drive up to Marks to prepare for Paris Monday morning - Dans birthday.
We had a great time. Dan enjoyed his birthday. If he ever gets around to updating his blog more than twice a year, he might even tell you what he though of it. The character breakfast was brilliant. Not much had changed in the parks, so we had a leisurely 4 days there. But the highlight was Dans biggest birthday surprise.
It was all arranged that Mark & Lyanne were meeting us out there on Tuesday. Dan had no idea about this. I got a text from Mark once they had arrived, and they made their way to the big castle and hid on the balcony at the back. I then took Dan over there on the pretence of going to get Peter Pan fastpass tickets and then just made him look up ... twice as he didn't spot them frantically waving first time..... I managed to catch the moment on film and will get it posted on here soon.
Of course, Disney, Mark & I is a good combination .... add the fabulousness of Lyanne and my darling Dan to that and you have 29 hours of screaming mirth. Halloween decorations had started appearing around Frontierland too, which was cool. It seems to be a Pumpkinheads V Witches theme......
Sadly, Mark & Lyanne were only there for a night, so Dan & I were back on our own for our last evening and day there and I decided that the last thing I wanted to do as a ride was Space Mountain. Which broke down while we were in the queue. I decided to give it until 3.30 but didn't want to be the first rider on after it had been broken! Most of the queue gave up and left .. leaving us and some Australian Rugby players ... as the first members of the public to ride after the break down. Shit my pants. Not literally.
We then had first class seats on the way home!
Friday was a day around Luton seeing family. We left Luton just before 7.00 to pick Richie up in Elstree as he is staying with us this week and having a chill out. The radio said that the M1 was bollocksed .. well not in those words as such ... so i went the back routes via St Albans ... and was stuck in traffic for ages. We then had a warning on the M4 saying there was a queue between junctions 16 & 17 due to an accident. Had they told us that we were going to be at a standstill for 2 and a half hours in said queue, I would have sniffed out a cross country route. Finally got home at almost 2.00am.
And that pretty much brings you up to date .... aside from the Spice Girls gig selling out yesterday in 38 seconds ..... guess I was lucky and got a ticket in the 20th second or so..... I feel a bit bad actually as Rach has been so great to me with the Prince tix, but I actually only had enough cash in my bank account to cover the cost of one ticket (paid a total of £86 after all charges n shit). Technically speaking, shouldn't have really paid that much for one for myself. If I get the chance to pick one up for her by some means, I will do.

Oh .. and how funny is this. I want to see a movie version.