Randomness

My life, the people in it and any other shit I decide to throw at you.

Tuesday, 2 October 2007

Prince & Princesses

And suddenly its 14 days later and its all been a bit insane. As a wise ex nun turned nanny for a Captain once sang, lets start at the very beginning, a very good place to start...
The Big Prince Night Out. My God it was tense. I could make a screenplay out of the drama that was me getting to the gig in time. It would be a bit shit though as it would consist of a good 40 mins of me standing in front of Cardiff Castle, huffing and puffing waiting for the megabus to show up and then the majority of the film would be me sat on a bus reading the Doctor Who novel Wetworld, occasionally glancing out of the window to scowl at the traffic on the M4 or in London. The next bit would be vaguely exciting as I dash across London to get from Victoria to the O2 Arena in 35 mins to try and get to the start of the gig at 8.30 - which will go up on time as it live on sky news .... especially the bits where I get stuck at the ticket machine behind a drunk guy who's card gets refused 5 times but he just keeps trying to buy a tube ticket. I would possibly insert me doing some killer karate chop at this point, rather than me just switching queues. Then instead of me standing on an almost empty tube on the Jubilee Line, I could insert a train full of rampaging Zombies. I might see if James Moran (writer of Severance who keeps a damn fine blog himself) wants to help .. if Pete is too busy that is.
So as it happened, Rach and I were still hacking along the corridor trying to work out how to operate glo-sticks as we heard the band strike up Controversy. By mid second song, we were in our seats,m which were frankly, the BEST SEATS EVER for a gig. Smack in front of the stage, but raised enough to give a view, on an aisle. Loving the work. I could wax lyrical about the ins and outs of the gig, our outstanding synchronised dancing, the electric atmosphere that comes from a sold out house made of real fans ... but unless you were there, you wont really get it.
Post concert, we had about a 2 hour wait before we could hit the Indigo2 for the After Show gig. This involved the worlds longest toilet queue ever and some mad man climbing lamp posts to try and steal a Prince banner by setting fire to the corners to detach it. No, really! Then the queue for the after show seemed to stretch back into Kent .... but we got in in quite good time and bagged decent seats upstairs.
Around 1.30, the band kicked in and the curtain opened to reveal the New Power Generation (excpeted), Prince on lead guitar (hoped for but wasn't guaranteed) and Amy Winehouse on vocals (total surprise!). This then lead to a very funky three hour jam, featuring a range of Prince hits and album tracks. I have never been to anything quite like it and have to say being in such an intimate venue packed out with real fans and real music lovers ... it was truly amazing.
But at 4.30, we wandered out, tired but elated to try and catch one of the three cabs that were operating. Along with about 2500 of the other 3000 people there. It was going to take some time ... or would have had some enterprising chap not been there with his car, offering slightly under taxi rates to drive people home. Rach thought we were possibly going to be murdered, but I had already fought off that trainload of zombies, so was confident I could handle some small Ukrainian looking bloke in a rather roomy Ford.
Now you'd think that given the hellish journey up, 5 hours worth of gig n shit would mean the end of this tale. But no ....
Being the canny lass she is, Rach had espied a Magnum vending machine in the hotel foyer. As we pooled cash to pay the £18 for the 20second cab ride to the hotel (it would have been over £20 in a black cab and wasn't doable on foot unless we fancied either walking through the Blackwall Tunnel or swimming the Thames) and was now worrying that we couldn't afford said ice cream treats when we got back. I assured her I had further change in my pocket to cover an ice cream. So we arrive, we head for machine, I insert the ludicrous price required for said sweet on a stick, Rach chooses with Almond variety.
Computer says no
Or rather make another selection. Given Rach has now been up just over 24 hours, she has a little trouble with the idea of that one being sold out, starting us both giggling as I try and advise on other selections. She goes for a classic and I settle for diet coke and a bag of crisps.
We retire to our room and start to finally unwind. After conversation of how it has actually been the best night out in the history of everness, I go to brush my teeth. The hot tap is on slightly... and being the freak I am, cant actually let this go and need it to stop. It wont budge left to turn off, so I figure that a turn right may loosen it up a tad so I can turn it off completely. Wrong. Its now running a bit more and still wont shift left. I venture out to Rach to advise her what I am doing (I was tired) and go back in to try the same method again. Resulting in a steady stream of scolding hot water and hysterical giggles from the pair of us. I eventually got the tap off, soaking my night shirt in the process and we got some sleep.
Saturday was coffee with Richie before getting the bus home. Even this simple task went wrong as I failed to notice that the DLR train I was on didn't go to Canary Wharf where I was meeting him, so I had to hop off at Poplars and walk back..... which you'd think would be easy ... finding a bloody great sky scraper in London that was built to access a hole in the space time continuum .. but no .. could constantly see it, just couldn't get to the fucking thing.
Then of course, Sunday was a drive up to Marks to prepare for Paris Monday morning - Dans birthday.
We had a great time. Dan enjoyed his birthday. If he ever gets around to updating his blog more than twice a year, he might even tell you what he though of it. The character breakfast was brilliant. Not much had changed in the parks, so we had a leisurely 4 days there. But the highlight was Dans biggest birthday surprise.
It was all arranged that Mark & Lyanne were meeting us out there on Tuesday. Dan had no idea about this. I got a text from Mark once they had arrived, and they made their way to the big castle and hid on the balcony at the back. I then took Dan over there on the pretence of going to get Peter Pan fastpass tickets and then just made him look up ... twice as he didn't spot them frantically waving first time..... I managed to catch the moment on film and will get it posted on here soon.
Of course, Disney, Mark & I is a good combination .... add the fabulousness of Lyanne and my darling Dan to that and you have 29 hours of screaming mirth. Halloween decorations had started appearing around Frontierland too, which was cool. It seems to be a Pumpkinheads V Witches theme......
Sadly, Mark & Lyanne were only there for a night, so Dan & I were back on our own for our last evening and day there and I decided that the last thing I wanted to do as a ride was Space Mountain. Which broke down while we were in the queue. I decided to give it until 3.30 but didn't want to be the first rider on after it had been broken! Most of the queue gave up and left .. leaving us and some Australian Rugby players ... as the first members of the public to ride after the break down. Shit my pants. Not literally.
We then had first class seats on the way home!
Friday was a day around Luton seeing family. We left Luton just before 7.00 to pick Richie up in Elstree as he is staying with us this week and having a chill out. The radio said that the M1 was bollocksed .. well not in those words as such ... so i went the back routes via St Albans ... and was stuck in traffic for ages. We then had a warning on the M4 saying there was a queue between junctions 16 & 17 due to an accident. Had they told us that we were going to be at a standstill for 2 and a half hours in said queue, I would have sniffed out a cross country route. Finally got home at almost 2.00am.
And that pretty much brings you up to date .... aside from the Spice Girls gig selling out yesterday in 38 seconds ..... guess I was lucky and got a ticket in the 20th second or so..... I feel a bit bad actually as Rach has been so great to me with the Prince tix, but I actually only had enough cash in my bank account to cover the cost of one ticket (paid a total of £86 after all charges n shit). Technically speaking, shouldn't have really paid that much for one for myself. If I get the chance to pick one up for her by some means, I will do.






Oh .. and how funny is this. I want to see a movie version.

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Wednesday, 13 June 2007

A Bad Sitch

Ok, its not something I talk about a lot, but I am a big fan of Disney Channels Teen Super Hero Kim Possible. Its one of those rare kids shows that really is enjoyable for adults too. So I am slightly distraught to read that its current season will be the last.
This has happened before, resulting in the big finale movie So The Drama in 2003, so I guess I shouldn't be too shocked.
Also, there appears to be a really cool experience at Epcot centre, that I don't think was there when I went last year, so has probably been scrapped, as this article seems to be 7 years old. Bollocks.

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Wednesday, 11 April 2007

Best. News. Ever

The Walt Disney Co. has changed its policy to allow same-sex couples to participate in a popular Fairy Tale Wedding program it runs mainly at its two U.S. resorts and cruise line, a Disney spokesman said Thursday. Disney previously had allowed gay couples to organize their own weddings or commitment ceremonies at rented meeting rooms at the resorts, but had barred them from purchasing its Fairy Tale Wedding package and holding the event at locations at Disneyland and Walt Disney World that are set aside specifically for weddings.
"We are updating our Fairy Tale Wedding guidelines to include commitment ceremonies," Disney Parks and Resorts spokesman Donn Walker said. "This is consistent with our policy of creating a welcoming, respectful and inclusive environment for all of our guests."
Walker said the change was prompted by "an inquiry from a guest that asked about this service." Disney had allowed gay couples to take part in its vow renewals program but excluded them from buying wedding packages by requiring a valid marriage license from California or Florida, which do not permit or recognize gay marriages.
Disney's Fairy Tale Wedding packages start at $8,000 and include a wedding planner, the ceremony, food and beverages, flowers and table decorations.The Lavish Wedding Option also includes a ride to the ceremony in the Cinderella coach, costumed trumpeters heralding the couple's arrival, and attendance by Mickey and Minnie Mouse characters dressed in formal attire.
Disney has come under fire from religious conservatives, including the Southern Baptist Convention, which have accused the company of promoting a gay agenda. The groups, which lifted an eight-year boycott of Disney in 2005, had criticized the company for such corporate policies as giving health benefits to same-sex partners of employees, allowing "Gay Day" celebrations at its theme parks and airing a prime time television show on its ABC network featuring openly gay comedian Ellen DeGeneres. "We are not in the business of making judgments about the lifestyle of our guests. We are in the hospitality business and our parks and resorts are open to everyone," Walker said.

Religious conservatives can suck my dick. I'm having a Disney wedding!

Thanks to everyone who has called me in the least few days to tell me about this. The fact that everyone who read it instantly got on the phone to me says something about how well you all know me and I love you all dearly.

Oh ... while we are on about the religious conservatives.....

http://newsbiscuit.com/article/turin-shroud-dyed-pink-in-washing-machine-bungle

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Tuesday, 13 February 2007

Florida memories....


Us after Dudley Do Rights Ripsaw


Witness my rebirth from the giant coke vagina of steam.


Rain. Lots of rain.

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Saturday, 18 November 2006

yet more......

Friday, 17 November 2006

more pix



Peter Pan meets Peter Pan! .. with Wendy
Josh and a Delorean.

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Tuesday, 14 November 2006

More Tales of the City

So MGM continued ...... I don't really want to go into great detail of what happens on every ride as it wont mean a lot if you haven't been and might spoil it for if you ever do get out there. Apart from to say the Great Movie Ride is lovely .... just for the final scene you arrive in ...... also the Beauty and the Beast Show is quite lovely too. Also, Kevin (Josh's ex) joined us for a few days

Fri 3: Seaworld. I fed sharks! Nuff said

Sat 4: A return trip around both universal parks for Kevin to experience them! More Men In Black! Also managed to actually get on the Hulk this time..........

Sun 5: Josh and Kevin left us to go to their respective homes :-( We went for a trip to the mall and bought a suit each (there was a deal on with two suits for $150 which was a major bargain) and saw The Nightmare Before Xmas 3d .... luckily no leaping off screen 3d so I saw the whole thing in glorious 3d with no pain to my eyes.

Mon 6: Epcot. I always find Epcot a bit on the dull side to be honest. Its a bit too preachy in its educational bit for my liking .... but then I have to consider its a) aimed at Americans and b) produced by Disney. The amount of 'oh no we are fucking up the planet we need to do something about it' was a tad grating ..... I just kept thinking that if energy, pollution and stuff is such a huge issue why the hell don't they just shut the theme parks and not waste so much of it on frivolity....... however, Soaring, the new ride there was great. You sit in a hang glider type thing and are help over a huge projection arial tour of California .... and they even add in the relevant smells .... well just the nice ones ........

Tue 7: Animal Kingdom. We managed to complete this in just on 5 hours so buggered off to the Magic Kingdom for a while too. And once we got there it started to rain. Not just spotting slightly, or a bit of drizzle. I mean rain so hard that you cant see far through it and each drop feels like a small stone being dropped on your head. For 2 hours. we had ponchos ..... its Disney, you have to .... but our feet were beyond soaked. my trainers are still moist......... I have video evidence of how bad it was.

Wed 8: Magic Kingdom. They have revamped Pirates of the Caribbean to tie in with the films .... and its quite cool! Also managed to meet Peter Pan and Wendy which was a personal highlight for me. The previous week, Universal had been dead ... no real queues to speak of or anything .. Disney was a different story..... we needed to get fast passes just to get on some rides .. and not the big coasters either, it was things like Its A Small World and Peter Pans Flight that had the big queues. I guess Magic Kingdom is the place for families and ickle kids .... or big kids who like such things.

Thu 9: Magic Kingdom again but our last day at Disney .. or any of the parks. With this in mind, I made sure we ended the day with a the firework display and watched it from a place where it was happening around the castle. So that was my last moment...... but the truly great thing (that people who really know me will totally get) was just before the fireworks started. The lights in the park had all gone out in preparation and Jiminy Crickets voice was explaining all about how dreams really can come true and how wishes are things that live within all of us .... and a real genuine shooting star went over the top of the castle.... and I cried and made a wish.

Fri 10: We were booked onto a shopping day. I had a fabulous time blowing the $1200 we still had left to spend. A pair of converse all stars, black 501's, books: Wicked, Son of a Witch, Confessions of an Ugly Step Sister, Devil Wears Prada to name a few, dvd's: The Brady Bunch season 1, Golden girls seasons 4 & 5 ... and a ton more! We were due to go and see Saw 3 in the evening but were too tired and had to pack.

Sat 11: check out of the hotel, check in our bags at downtown Disney desk and then went to see Flushed Away .... which is quite cute and well worth a look when it comes your way (Dec 1st for UK people) even if its just for the constant barrage of aardman and dreamworks in jokes.

So that was it really .... as I say, i could go into huge details on rides and stuff .... but there's not a lot of point. Either go and do them yourself or come over and watch my video diaries ........

so what have you been doing?

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Holiday tales pt 1

Ok ... so first and foremost. I am only ever flying Premium Economy ever again for flights over 2 hours. end of.

Our apartment was a sweet affair but only one floor up, which is a shame as I would have liked to have been higher than that .. but I'm nitpicking really.

Saturday 28: arrived, took a walk around I drive. Watched some tv.
Sunday 29 Nov: went for our welcome meeting, waited for Josh to arrive from Minneapolis, did some shopping. Had a KFC. Laughed at how the Americans call scones biscuits.

Monday 30: Universal Studios. Scorching hot day. No queues for any rides! (apart from Jaws which was bout 20 mins and rubbish). Men In Black rules - basically six of you are put into a car and have to shoot things.... you even get your individual score at the end of it. Josh introduced me to Smores. My name is Paul and I'm a smoresaholic.

Tuesday 31/Halloween: Oh my days. We scooted around Islands of Adventure in the daytime .... Dr Seuss landing is a trip and a half .... and that's sober ........ also much loving Duelling Dragons ride and the Poseidon walk around adventure thingy ....... got to meet a few of the X Men and had a bit of a thing for the guy in the wolverine suit ...... it was also this day when I hit a flaw in the whole holiday. You see, a lot of the rides there these days are 3d simulators ... so you don your specs and off you go in your vehicle to get tossed about like a good salad. Each one has a plot to follow, usually with you ending up in mortal peril and saving the day just by being there and the backstory is very nicely laid out for you in clear form as part of the queueing process .... so some rides actually fall a bit flat if you don't have to queue for them ..... like Spiderman (I only really got it second time around when we had a short queue explaining why we were sat in these odd cars roving the city). You see, the landscapes and vistas look amazing in 3d .... animated or otherwise ..... but each time a gun, fist, rock comes 'flying' off the screen towards you, my eyes just hurt and the image became a total blur. Bah! this 3d lark is shite, I found myself thinking until I realised that everyone else was ducking said gun, fist or rock. So its just me that it doesn't work for then? Great! And as I say, it probably accounts for about a third of the rides out there. Oh well. We got so soaked on the Ripsaw ride we had to buy an entire new outfit. If you are going here anytime ...... do not go on Dudley Do Rights Ripsaw unless you are prepared to get VERY VERY wet.

Then we went on to Universals Horror Night. Sweet Jesus I shit my pants.

To start, if you follow the suggested route, you find yourself in a street thick with fog ... not dry ice or smoke but somehow actual fog ..... filled with people on stilts who swoop on you or chainsaw wielding maniacs who stop inches from your face. Bit scary but fun .... especially if you are with someone like Josh who screams and runs from EVERYTHING! There was also a vampire alley that was very cool indeed and a zombie infested street. Josh found the zombies a bit too much until I suggested the Shaun of the Dead approach ... make like zombies ourselves ... and it worked! They ignored us after that. The Bill & Ted show was like totally awesome dudes. Especially the very very gay Magneto and his invisible green suit fx guy ...... The scream houses were what really did me in though. Each one had a particular theme and was basically a five minute walk through with people jumping at you continually and scaring the living shit from you. At one point Josh was actually climbing up my back to try and get out. The one themed around a madhouse was intense .... one room had a guy smeared in poop and he had written up the walls in it. Now, I know darn well they didn't actually smear a guy in his own crap and throw it up the walls ... but the SMELL .... I was about one breath away from throwing up when we got done with that section. Another called Run (based on the Saw and Hostel movies) turned my guts a bit and freaked em out ... especially when the people in front of us stopped moving, leaving us trapped with a 'nutter' wielding tools just to our left. You see, through these scream houses you are constantly on the move in one single file line ..... but its only wide enough for single file so you can only go as fast or slow as the line allows ...... and people ahead might not be wanting to move as quickly as you ...... and that can be fucking terrifying .... feeling very very trapped and your mind tells you you are safe but your heart has control of everything at that point ..... and its great fun. Of course, this was also a great chance to get in a few goes on Men In Black too........

Weds 1: As Dan still had his cold, especially after the ripsaw soaking, I told him to stay home and Josh and I went to a mall. Well, it was America, I just had to. A stunning amount of gay men in Florida have girlfriends you know. I don't know who to feel sorry for most, the guys who don't feel they can be true to themselves or the poor women they are lying to.

Thu 2: Disney's MGM studios. They have knocked down the Golden Girls house! That's all I can say about this day right now .... I need a moment .........

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